Sunday, May 30, 2010


SSF Interrogation With..

Misti Rainwater-Lites

SSF: What do you think your first love is doing at this moment?

Misti: My first love was my first cousin. We were best friends from the time we were toddlers until I was four and he was five. He was my first French kiss when I was seven. I think he's eating a bowl of cereal and watching cartoons.

SSF: Did you ever have an imaginary friend? What was his/her name?

Misti: I had lots of imaginary friends. Don't remember their names. When I was a teenage virgin I would make up pillow talk. Practice, I guess, for when I finally got laid. I have two alter egos....Kim Wu, a belligerent, no bullshit Chinese chick, and Koko Loko....a delirious chimpanzee.

SSF: What do you think is the biggest misconception about your personality?

Misti: Hmmm...that I'm meek. I am not meek. I'm a good sport and I'm generally phlegmatic but at heart I am a tiger. Not a tigress. A tiger. Grrrrrrr.

SSF: What word do you think is overused?

Misti: "literally"...and it is misused and it is making my toenails curl....not literally

SSF: If you found out you could eat anything for the month and wouldn't intake the calories--what would you eat?

Misti: Chef Boyardee Pizza...nothin' but dough, sauce and Parmesan cheese

SSF: What are you the most proud of that you have written?

Misti: Nova's Gone Potty because I wrote the original version in three weeks and I've worked more on that novel than anything else. I can't tell you how many times I've revised it. Just completed a radical revision last year. So it took me four years to write that book.

SSF: What are you working on now?

Misti: A gay porno story about two men who meet in the Sexy Singles Sunday school class. It's called Believers. They're giving each other blow jobs in a car.

SSF: What are you currently reading?

Misti: The King James Bible and Stumpfucker Cavalcade and Homage To Mistress Bradstreet

SSF: Thoughts on tattoos:

Misti: I have a Dia de Los Muertos skull on my upper right arm...when I go to San Francisco next month I plan to get a Gusano Rojo bottle on my upper left arm. More tattoos in my future. Yes yes yes.

SSF: What street address do you remember waking up happiest at?

Misti: I forget the address but it was the first studio apartment I got after I left my first husband. It was in Albuquerque, New Mexico. It was March 2004 and I was on fire with love and lust and freedom. Hallefuckinlujah!!!

SSF: Any last words?

Misti: I'm horny and sleepy. I want to go to sleep and have sexy dreams. Then I'll wake up and finish my cock sucking story and start the next one. I'm all about the literary sucking of the cock this month.

Interested in being interrogated? Email me at Put 'Interrogate Me' in the subject line and please attach a photograph. Thank you!

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